jedi, elf or Klansman?

The hostel that we stayed at in Glasgow was small and more focused on fun than it was cleanliness. Which was fine because the guys that work there are nice and it was really relaxed atmosphere. One of the guys that works there, called James who is quite possibly the geekiest person I have ever met and would be happy to here that and is proud to out geek anyone that crosses his path.

One night after many tiny french tesco beers, or biere speciale while talking about his LARPing adventures James announced that he ad one of his elf costumes upstairs, which he then quickly retrieved for me to try on.

Complete with elf ears I started my exploration of this geeky world. It was great fun and I loved wearing the robe; but something about it seemed a little off. This white robe which I had come to love with its pointed hood reminded me of another social group (not LARPers) that are outside of society norms.

Everyone had to try on the ears, but only I would wear the robe and I found myself not wanting to take it off. I even kept it on when I made the last minute beer run before closing time. Everyone warned me not to go wearing it in case I ran into some NEDs who would likely beat the shit out of me and/or knife me. Ignoring their concerns off I went with little trouble as I made my purchase. I was however over come by laughter on the way back when I heard from a passing car "YOU FUCKING WANK!!!!!!!"

The Engine Shed

Although Edinburgh maybe one of the most boring cities in the world (Everything Closes at 7!) there are some gems that make this place worth it. The Engine Shed is definitely one of them. Located next to picturesque Arthurs Seat it is a delicious alternative to deepfried.........Everything else.

The Cafe is its self is located on the second floor of a beautifully restored, historic (you guessed it) engine shed that dates back to the 1830's and was used for british rail. They serve up well-prepared vegan and vegetarian dishes at an affordable price. Although its open from 10 to 4 there is only a 3 hour window to get a hot meal so get there from 12 to 3.

You may be asking yourself why should I go out of my "way to go eat some vegan hippy bullshit?" and I would say to that, "get over yourself asshole." Not only is the food worth it but The Engine Shed has an amazing mandate. The staff is made up of people with disabilities that work there to gain skill and confidence to enter the work force and they have been doing it for 21 years and counting. The first time someone rang in my order and gave me my change (with a little assistance) she actually said "this is fun, I love doing the till" I dont think you would hear that anywhere else. This place is magic

It Does Exist

It is great that museums and Art Galleries in the UK have free entry, something that maybe Canada should look into. I was afraid however that because they we not those entrance pounds that they were really suffering with content. All of the museums that we went to see in Glasgow and Edinburgh didn’t seem to make much sense. They just threw some objects that they were able to get their hands on into a room with no purpose or logic. I was afraid this was all that I had to look forward to until we finally found what we wanted

The fruitmarket gallery is a contemporary art center in Edinburgh that it’s I nice intimate but lofty space that had one of the better shows Ive seen in quite a while. Its called Childish Things curated by David Hopkins with artists Louise Bourgeois, Susan Hiller, Jeff Koons and Paul McCarthy.

Its a dark view of childhood toys and films that just swell to look at.

If your here before January go there, Im talking to you Michael Jamie and AJ.

http://fruitmarket.co.uk/

The Philosopher's Stone

So I did it, I got a job and a flat I officially have some sort of live in the UK, Im no longer a vegabond drifting from place to place looking for towels, flip flops and a place to sleep for at least one night.

Today I started work where Literature BEGAN. The very place where J.K. Rowling wrote the epic tale of the little wizard that could (or couldn’t I have no fucking clue I didn't read the books). The story goes; back when she was a well fair mom she used to go to this Cafe the has a view of Edinburgh Castle and fantasize about a little boy that could do amazing things and then became a multi-millionaire.

It is full of up tight WASPS who will order a cut of coffee and sit there all day and bark at you if you try to take the dirty cup away that they MAY get a refill, and tourists from Canada who ask you where she used to sit, and if she ever still comes, and where exactly was Harry birthed and by our staff T-shirts for £15 to give to some brat.

Its funny but it's a job so I guess something is working.

Why the Tate Modern is Great and Why I Hate It

The Tate Modern... What can you say about it? Its a major international art institution, even if you don't care about art and you visit London you will likely go there. It has great works by great artists and incredibly high paid curators that know what they are doing.

But when it comes down to it all we really care about is what is going on in the Turbine room. The building was originally as a huge power plant on the south bank of River Thames, but converted into art museum following the trend of contemporary art spaces taking over unused industrial spaces. Walking into the Tate modern you enter a vast space that makes for interested exhibitions that are made specifically for the enormous room.

Currently there is a show on by Chinese artist Al Weiwei who hired an entire factory to execute his project. He hired factory manufacture millions of sunflower seeds made out of porcelain and each one hand painted.

These seeds were to take up the entire space and visitors were intended to be able to walk through and interact with this landscape. For a time you were able to however when officials came to the understanding that the seeds were being stolen then quickly put a stop to it and put a rope around the exhibition. This is another example of art spaces doing that they believe to be their duty to protect the work that they are showing actually does more damage to the work than good. Having the Tate Modern stop the public from getting walk around the work destroys it.

What’s the worst that could have happened? If the gallery was completely cleared out of seeds and the floor empty, it would just bring an interesting dialog about how greedy we are and how dependent we are on Chinese factory produced goods.

Also: I WANTED TO STEAL SOME DAMN IT!!!

Francis Picabia

Francis Bacon

Andy Warhol

Joseph Beuys

national dishes

I love the food here (in the "oh my god that is disgusting and hilarious I cant believe people eat that" kind of way not the "this is amazing and delicious kind of way"). Everything is deepfried, chips, veggie burgers, mars bars, toast, ice cream and even... pizza. This one I had to try; it is just so disgusting and I didnt even understand how they could to that. I asked and they explained it to me like I was an idiot. They take a frozen pizza and throw it in a deep fryer and there you go a; Scottish delicacy

tesco french beer. £2.80 for a 8 pack

"Im really excited to travel. I know that's what were doing right now, but I want to travel somewhere... better.

-Emily Power, in glasgow hostel room

Its only the cutesiest of racism for the Scottish. On our last day in Glasgow we went into a discount store in Merchant city close to the east end where we found these lovely little bundles of oppression for only £3.99 for the small and £5.99 for the larger.

A few hours later when we were checking out of our hostel there was a guy at the desk in full black face and no one said a thing about it. We just thought it was something football related. When we asked someone about it later they thought it was just as strange as we did.

Day 6 (well day 6 has come and gone but were still new that this thing kids and we don’t have internet connection everywhere so chill the fuck out)

Day 6 - Emily loses her passport!

We were packing up our things to leave our first couch surfing house which was both chilly physically and figuratively. We were going through everything and Emily calmly informs me that she doesn’t have her passport. Of course I don’t believe that its gone because she daily "loses" something and then finds it. This time however it was real.

She though she know where it was, so we headed down to where we ate lunch the day before contemplating what we were going to do if it wasn’t there. Where is the embassy? How long will it take to get another one? and we were going to London the next morning which we were going to have to cancel. We made it and it was behind the counter. Good thing were in Edinburgh and not Mexico City.

We don’t know why but its cold and damp everywhere. Even when we go inside. Were Canadian so you would think that we would be used to it, but no were very whiney and complainy and cant get used to it. Were beginning to realize traveling to the UK in November may not have been the best idea. Once we get an apartment we should be fine.

best places so far:

Mono

http://www.monocafebar.com/

It’s a veggie/vegan place that makes its own ginger beer. Its a really large space that has tones of space and comfy couches, they have shows at night and local art for sale on the walls. The paintings were softly painted portraits of people in urban spaces. We were really excited because we finally that had a place that had food that was not meat oriented (or so we thought) the soup was great but the spicy chips with "aoli" (which was bland vegan mayo) were not so great and the black bean burger was missing something. They also have veggie haggis and veggie bangers in mash. Were not brave enough to try the veggie version of local dishes quite yet.

Brass Monkey:

http://www.theskinny.co.uk/venue/5617-brass-monkey

I think we found our hangout. Its a really cool looking dark traditional looking bar when you walk in that was playing motown tracks. It has something that makes it a little special. In the back there are a bunch of day beds with pillows where you can lay down relax and have a pint, but for God sakes don't drink the coffee.

They play movies at night. We were tired because we hadn’t slept and were wondering the streets in our homeless goalless way all day and it was the perfect place to go, relax and watch a movie in the dark with strangers.

by far the best place is forest cafe (but I'll write more about that later when my computer battery isn’t dying)

http://forestcafe.tumblr.com/

Chicken or Beef or Nothing

The angry flight attendant who scolded me for using my knitting needle on the tv screen, smiled when answering "no" to our question "is there a vegetarian option?" She agreed that it was a good idea when we suggested to just eat what did not have meat in the meal but still walked away leaving us with nothing.

She later gave me a cold stare when she discovered me covered in 6 or so empty wine bottles that I had stolen from the cart when the santa claus attendant turned his back for a moment.

Were off to a good, hungry, booze filled start